Pirate Adam

Thike 1193

As Adam walks through the main entrance, he's approached by one of many identical women in identical uniforms. She greets him with with a perfectly pleasant, welcoming, and meaningless smile. Precisely engineered. Ideally calibrated. No mistakes. Not like him. She speaks:

"Welcome to the latest attraction in the SSL, the Wonderland Zoo and Park! My name is Cindi, courtesy of Haas-Bioroid, and I'll be your guide today. I recommend you start with one of our most famous features here in the zoo, the green sea turtle! Driven nearly to extinction by climate change in the 21st century, we're doing what we can to preserve these majestic creatures. With the right care and attention they can grow to massive sizes! Past that you'll find the enclosure where we've replicated Africa that was. Our friends at Jinteki Corporation have worked their magic yet again, bringing back numerous extinct animals from ages past. You'll see massive predatory reptiles, strange birds, and much more.

"Once you make it through the zoo portion of the Park, there's still much more to explore! Those with curious minds can attend presentations and lectures by our resident academics, while children of all ages can enjoy our Physical Activity Zone. There you can run, climb, swing and jump to your heart's content in a perfectly safe environment. We've even provided unique mobility gadgets for your enjoyment.

"Do you have any questions I can answer, or can I collect your entrance fee so that you can begin your experience?"

Adam hadn't thought this far ahead. He pauses for moment, then has an idea. "I'm not here for the park. Can you point me towards the computational facilities? I'm here to interview the man who maintains them for my broadcast."

"Hm... This is highly unorthodox. Most requests of this nature go through our Media Division. Please wait..." Her face slackens slightly as she connects with her managing AI for instructions.

Just then, an alarm sounds. All of the greeters turn in unison to face a man who had just passed through the entrance.


Adam doesn't waste this moment. He ducks into a hallway, glancing at a facility map on the wall. He bolts as soon as he's out of sight of the crowd at the entrance. He quickly finds his destination, bursts through the door, and sees his goal sitting with about four bioroids worth of parts strewn across the desk in front of him.

The man sighs.

"What are you doing here? You know not to bother me at my day job."

"I lost something. You can get it back. You owe me."

"Fine, kid. Open up and I'll see what I can do."

This is v1.0 of my Pirate Adam deck. It started as a conversation about janky Adam ideas, and then I realized that this one might actually be functional. It won't win worlds, but it actually works, which was surprising.

Basically, this deck can get in for power runs. Between Femme, Dean Lister, Grappling Hook, and the shaper resources, you have all the tools you need to break just about anything for cheap. Not infinitely, but when you need to. Playing this deck starts like most Aumakua Adam decks: use the turtle and Directives to apply early pressure. The midgame mostly consists of setup via installing all the resources and applying a little pressure to stop the corp from running away with the game. The late game is when you remote camp and power through R&D to grab whatever you see there. It's a little poor, so be conservative with your cash. An early drug dealer may be expensive, but i really helps get all those breaker-esque cards on the board.

This isn't a perfect list. The Retrieval Run influence is the most flexible, despite my being pretty happy with the slot. Things I'm going to look into:

  • Drive By / Infiltration to ensure worthwhile runs
  • Trope to bring back breakers
  • Peace in our Time to help with cash issues
  • Scrubber to help with assets
  • Maxwell James / Hunting Grounds to help with the breakerless breaking
  • Finding space for Always be Running, since it fits the theme and is nice with Lovegood

Anyways, that's the silly idea I've been obsessed with. Thanks for reading this far.

Oh, and about the story: I was in a weird mood. ¯\(ツ)

18 Mar 2018 Thike

Addendum: this deck is so dumb. I love it.