who up playing with they turtle at worlds 2024

hello everyone. i am just going to do a quick write-up of this 419 list because my 2024 Worlds Report has been stapled to my corp list write-up and because there is already an excellent guide on how this deck works. i'll just briefly explain the changes i made and quickly descripe my experience with it.

changes

1. i added an embezzle because it seemed highly relevant in the current meta. being able to hit seamless, fully op, neurospike, punitive, etc., really shored up some of my weaker matchups. also, and more importantly: i really like playing it.

2. i dropped one copy of mining accident for a mimic and a leech (which also allowed me to drop carmen). i did miss the third mining accident but carmen simply sucks. mimic, on the other hand, absolutely beats ass in the current meta. every purple deck you face is playing three copies of drafter, which you can now break for 2 instead of 4. mimic can handle nearly any sentry you encounter and, when combined with leech, you can basically handle anything. sure, you might get fucked by an archer, but that was going to happen anyway!

3. i dropped one of the two copies of reprise. it made me sad to do but they have a bad habit of sitting in hand so i think one is probably the right number. it is extremely fun and impactful though.

4. added forged activation orders. i did this on a lark when @risingconcern pointed out that, to my great surprise, it was still legal. mostly i just thought it'd be funny to play a card i hadn't seen in standard since like 2015. in practice though, it absolutely crushed. it's just a very devastating combination with the other cards in this package. diversion of funds into forged activation orders; forged activation orders on server x so that you can run server y, effectively doubling your pressure; just do it for fun when you're feeling ballsy because you'll look cool when you're right.

ultimately, i don't think criminal are very competitively viable right now, but i do think that competent pilots with the right attitude can Make It Work. i am historically a devout criminal player, despite how often they are bad, and so the sort of pressuring and aggression necessary to make a deck like this work mostly comes natural to me. it definitely suffered compared to my PE but across both crown of servers and standard, it did feel fun and playable (if not especially powerful). it eats shit to R+ though, i can tell you that much. lost both of my games against them and even getting close to winning was like pulling teeth.

thank you for reading. please consider visiting my corp deck write-up if you'd like to read more about my experience at worlds. alternatively, click here if you'd like to see an image of a real goose saying "I love coffee!" to a cartoon goose who has a cup of coffee that is much too large for him.

p.s. yes i play 47 cards i don't care about anything didn't you see i played forged activation orders